Service Provider

Aha! Has language changed so much that in the last few years the meanings of words are totally reversed from what they used to mean. "Service Provider" you'd think would be a company providing you a service you were willing to pay for. But, since becoming a cell phone user I have learned that a "Service Provider" is actually a company you pay way too much money, who in turn provides you with a brain aneurysm every month when the bill arrives. I bet if I really wanted an aneurysm, I could manage one nicely without paying Sprint for it.

My bill came today. My brain is still muddled from the 1 hour ++++ I spent on the phone using obscenities when I was sure no one was there and adversely hoping they were taping my entire tirade so they'd be sure to know how pissed off I was and how often I repeated "I hate these people, I hate these people, I hate these people, I hate these people.

In all fairness, perhaps I went into the cell phone "contract" with a negative attitude. Anyway, I hope it is only this experience that makes me wonder if I'm not turning into a conspiracy theorist. I really don't want to find myself an aging bitter old hag who trusts no one and believes in nothing, but I having serious doubts about myself in this respect and about my future. Now, before I joined the program, I asked a few people about their service provider was and one phrase I heard more than once was "billing horror stories". It seemed that no matter which company you might choose you would wind up in war with them once you became a customer.

Now, I have had a reliable Track phone for a few years. It is prepaid and worked just fine for my usage. Every few months I'd add minutes while rolling over the unused ones. I averaged paying about $10-15 a month. Not bad. I rarely turned the thing on and only used it when it was "necessary". My daughter also had a prepaid phone account with Virgin. She, however, used her phone a lot and it had begun to wear out. She knew she needed to replace it and approached me regarding getting another phone. Well, my phone was definitely "not cool" and it didn't text message nor have a camera or cool games, you know, the stuff that made having a cell phone really "neat".

So, the weekend before Jamelah moved off to Ann Arbor we stopped in at a Sprint store (it was a Saturday and the store in our community was closed) in Jackson. The phones were neat. I got a pink metallic Katana and Jamelah picked out a blue razor. We paid the $198 to get us going and walked out of the place grinning. We had a family plan with unlimited, no roaming, fees and free nights and weekends. Plus for $20 extra we added the family plan for unlimited text messaging. We were now super cool chicks.

Two weeks later I received my first bill. Uh-huh! I hadn't had the phone long enough to recharge it and I had my first bill which was exactly $50 more than it was supposed to be. I had my first long distance, "on hold" forever experience. We finally got everything straightened out, I thought, and the guy was just taking care of the final details when the phone went dead. I thought it was no biggie, until yesterday when I got my second bill.

This time the bill was exactly$130 more than the amount I was guaranteed would be my monthly total. Seriously, $75.00 charged for overages. I could not figure that out. We had 500 minutes to use between the 2 of us and at the end of the month still had time left over. What was this overage business? Furthermore, the adjustments they were going to make, weren't adjusted and they had added an additional fee for activating my phone. What... I had already paid for the activation of the service.

Well, I was justifiably angry. You bet. So the ordeal began. I won't go into all the nitty-gritty. I actually don't want to do a blow-by-blow account. I'd probably curl up into a ball again and start babbling and crying in frustration. I tried really hard to remain calm while on the phone, keep a quiet voice and not call anyone names. Now it was easy not to call the young lady on the phone bad names. She was actually a sweetheart. I think, no matter how much she is being paid, it isn't enough. I wouldn't take her job on a bet.

We eventually reached an understanding. A few adjustments were made to my bill (I hope), some costs erased (or so she said, but I'll wait for the next one to arrive) and see just exactly what charges are made. Needless to say, I have decided that cell phone companies are simply the latest "conn" game going with their programs that their employees can't wade through, their salespeople can't stay on top of and the poor customer can't survive without going into shock regularly. I empathize with the employees while wondering why with the speed of technology they are unable to keep up with their own stuff and make the customer feel valued instead of used and abused.

Whatever, what I really want right now, is my track phone back with its prepaid minutes, handy in my purse for me to pull out and use at my convenience. That is what a cell phone is for. This other stuff, might be good for the kiddies but I really think it may cause people my age's brain to explode.


AN ADDENDUM: After 3 phone calls, many tears and much persuasion, I happfily announce that I have finally made peace with Sprint. My last bill was exactly what I had calculated it to be and there were no new surprises and no new hidden charges. I'm not sure why this is so difficult and why it had to be such a hassle. I'm just glad that for now the war has ended. Now, excuse me. I have a lot of talking to do on my cell phone. I have all kinds of minutes to use up!