Those Little New Hope Critters

I have mentioned that I work part time as a church secretary. I rather like the job, but some weeks, Pastor will be attending a conference or whatever and it gets really "quiet" around here.

I was having one of THOSE quiet weeks, when I started getting a creepy sensation along my neck. You know the feeling, the hairs stand up and you have cold chills. I knew I wasn't alone anymore. Now, I'm not psychic or anything. I had proof I wasn't alone. That proof was the constant patter of tiny feet in the ceiling tiles just over my head.

"Oh Crap!' I thought. It must be a mouse up there. Our church is located in a rural setting (just outside city limits) and mice peering out around things is not uncommon. They don't usually come into my office, though, unless we're beginning to be over run by them. One gentleman in our church is an exterminator and a couple years ago he began providing the church with his services after a winter where the church was over run with mice. I haven't seen one since that winter nor any tell tale signs that they are lurking about.

So... anyway, there is a mouse running around in the ceiling tiles over my head. I backed my chair up and peered at the ceiling over my desk trying to see where a weak point might be, just in case, the critter should drop through and fall on top of my head. After a thorough inspection of the ceiling I decide that the mouse is not going o fall on top of me and decide to get back to work. I'm quite successful at it for a while, but every once in a while that pitter/patter sound still gave me the creeps.

Then the sounds went from "pitter/patter" to "What the heck." Now and then there would be a loud kerplunk, followed by a thunk/thunk sound, then skittering noises and then...

and then...

I decided, WAIT! This can't be a mouse. It's making too much noise. It must be a squirrel. Another scenario with which I am familiar since my home at one time was frequently invaded by squirrels. However, they seldom got beyond the attic part of the house, so although I heard them, I never saw them. We had a huge walnut tree that shadowed the rear of the house and our back porch. In the fall you'd swear the squirrels were using those walnuts for bowling balls as you could hear the nuts rolling down over the roof. Finally, 2 years ago we cut that tree down. I love trees. But that one really made a mess and one year a fallen walnut even broke my daughter's windshield. So, I haven't missed that tree. But, it did give me experience w/the sound squirrels make, but I digress. Back to the church!

So, OK, then. Not a mouse. Probably a squirrel. It is spring. Nesting time for all God's creatures and I decided the louder noises were just the little buggers moving the furniture into a more comfortable arrangement. Not happy about that, but figured as long as they don't come through the ceiling it will wait until the next day when Pastor will be back.

My 4 hrs up... I went home leaving the nesting squirrels to their own devices until the next day. I decided to email pastor and let him know we had been invaded just in case he dropped by the church before morning. I tried to be cute and told him that the sounds over my head sounded like they were dragging around dead bodies, so just in case I didn't show up the next day, he'd want to investigate the tiles over the office of the church and see if you could find me tied up there.

Next morning I got to work on time, peeking carefully around my door, wondering if anything is going to run at me. Nothing did. So I entered, dropped my stuff on the desk, rounded it and bent over to turn on my computer. "Swoosh" over my head. I stood up thinking, OH. MY. GOD. THAT. HAS. TO. BE. A. BAT.

I'm not going to get all carried away here, but bats give me the heebee-jeebies. I stood up and found myself eye level with a lovely little sparrow which had lit on the top shelf of my work station. Swoosh! Off it flew. Into pastor's office.

I followed in into Pastor's office and it was clearly distraught, flying at the windows trying to get out. I tried to open the outside door to his office but it has a deadbolt lock and there wasn't a key around. So, then I tried opening the windows. I finally got them open, then ran for the door between our offices and slammed it. I was hoping the bird would find its way out. I stood listening as the poor creature flew around in there bumping into things.

I went back to my office and email pastor (since he enters his office through the outside door) to watch out for something flying at his head. Then I decided I'd better try to get some work done. That's when I noticed the noise in his office had stopped.

I carefully opened the door and peeped in, then walked and looked everywhere but couldn't see the bird. I listened and heard the familiar chirping sound but it was not coming from just outside the opened window. I quickly shut windows so the little guy couldn't get back in and breathed a heavy sigh of relief.

A few minutes later Pastor arrived ready to do whatever needed to be done to get the bird out of our office. I told him all was well and the creature had left.

Then I asked him why the creatures only showed up when he was out of town. "Well," he said, "You know what they say; when the boss is away the creatures play!"

Uh-huh, uh-huh. That's right!